Monday, March 23, 2015

How Far Are You Willing To Go?

In the winter time, our off-season for shows, I grow a beard. 

No one is happy about it at my house, but I get tired of shaving (which involves having to sculpt my psychobilly side chops, which I am constantly messing up and making uneven and the most inappropriate times), and it gets cold. I don't like being cold. 

When I was younger and rode motorcycles all the time, I tended to grow a beard in the winter, then shave every summer. Again - cause it is cold. I used to get crap at this one place I worked because they felt the beard to be unprofessional. Like my hair braided down to my waist fit in with their office culture (NOT!). 

I am lucky - I can grow a pretty impressive beard in a very short amount of time. So traditionally, I stop shaving in November, and by December I look pretty burly. Usually, then, I have to shave in January when shows start up again. 

Not this year, though. 

This year, I opted to keep the beard a while longer. After all, it was terribly cold this winter!! Sub-zero weather made the thought of shaving unbearable. So I didn't. 

While my daughter does like me having a beard, her mother does not. The complaints began while my chin was scruffy & scratchy, continuing as my upper lip disappeared under a thick mustache, and continued as I took a straighter to my beard to make it "stretch" as long as possible. 

When I was not combing it the wrong way. 

Or making it do funny things. 

Or taking pics of myself in the Cracker Barrel bathroom. Like a nutjob. 

There are other NSFW photos of me and my beard... I'm saving them for TMZ. 

So though I was having fun with it, and liked the way it looked, my girl was decidedly not enjoying it. And while she said that it was up to me what I wanted to do -- 

Well, that coupled with the fact that my beard was also a huge fire risk for me at every show (though I did get stellar advice from fellow performer Tyler Fyre how to treat it to keep it from burning, which totally worked for the shows I did with the beard) -- on the first day of spring, I decided it was time to shave. 

So I invited my girl to help me out - and we shaved away! Here are some highlights:

Until, somewhat, back to "normal."

We really had a great time together, removing my beard - and now my lips are fully kissable!

However, ever since that day, I catch her looking at me wistfully and saying, "You know - I really miss your beard."

Sigh. You just can't win!

1 comment:

  1. LMAO!! To every day my mom mentions how much she hates my dad's beard, but when he shaved it off she wasn't too happy with that either. XD I don't really care one way or the other. A man should know his own face and what looks good on it. Whatever makes you (people in general) happy.

    Personally, though, my favorite is the first of the shaving-progression pics. Fabulous 'stache there.