Today I met both my son's crush and my daughter's nemise.
My kids attends a Sunday school at the insistence of both their grandmothers. Not that I feel it is not important, it is just that it is REALLY early in the morning for me and their mom. Just saying.
But we keep up on it. Help them learn their prayers and go over the details of their instruction (I answer a fair amount of morality questions... Let that thought take hold). However, we are really not very active in their actual classrooms, or interact with their teachers or the other students.
This last week was the end of this school year, though, and my son's class had a breakfast for all the parents so, as parents, we were obliged to go. My son kept acting squirrelly, though, so finally I confronted him:
"Hey man," I said. "Do you not want your mom and I to go to this thing?"
"No," he replied.
"You sure? Cause we really don't want to go."
"No, I want you to go... Wait - you don't want to go?"
"We are not going to embarrass you or anything? You're not ashamed to be seen with us? Cause you are kind of embarrassing."
"Nothing like that... Wait - I'm embarrassing."
"Don't say things like that, you'll get a complex. Then what is the deal with you? You're all squirrelly."
"Dad... Can I ask you a question?"
"Get the candy first, son."
"Not that... What should I do of I lurk a girl...?"
That was it! The world might as well have been ending. His mother burst into tears. The dog howled forlornly. The cat hissed and arched its back. I stood up pointing accusingly:
"I know this day would come! You're gonna go to jail, son!!"
He looked surprised. "For liking a girl?!?"
His mother sobbed harder. The dog hunkered on the floor and covered its eyes with its paws. The cat jumped down and ran off. I sat back down.
"Oh, liked. I thought you were getting involved in stalking someone."
"Is that bad?"
"I'm my experience, it is very time consuming. But never mind that now - who is this girl?"
So the story came out: there was a girl in Grennan's class that he thought was cute. Over his mother's sobs, he gushed about this girl. What she did. Who her friend was. Blah blah blah...
Whatever. They are 9-years-old. Not a lot or world-changing revelations there.
But it was cute and he wa adorable talking about her. But, eventually, I had to ask him why we were having this discussion.
My son's birthday comes at the end of the school year. It has become something of a tradition to make his birthday party a big cook-out/summer kick-off with his mates, school chums and their families, as well as with our extended families (invitations go out to second cousins, great-aunts, the whole gamut) and friends of the family, as well as out of town friends who find themselves even remotely close to our house. It is huge.
So it came down to my son wanting to invite this girl to this big 10th birthday party. THIS was a step in a direction, for sure.
So now our attendance at the breakfast had another purpose: to help him ask the girl to the party.
While we were there it was cute, as he tried to surreptitiously watch her to see if she was looking at him. Rehearsing what he wanted to say to her. U.S. Discussing how he should present himself to her parents (who were there). I pointed out to him that her best friend never left we side - so he was going to have to ask both of them, not just to be polite - but also so she could have someone she was comfortable with at his party, too, until she got to know everyone.
But we could not get him to talk to her! Shyness was winning over his game - and when her family (and her friend & friend's family) stood up to leave early, disaster almost struck. Luckily, I fear neither man, devil, or Buddha - so I sidled up to the parents and managed to get my son's invitation across.
Now, we see what happens at the party.
After the breakfast and party invite, we headed to my daughter's classroom. My daughter looked adorable in a summer-y dress that set off her blue eyes and blonde hair, and cute sandals. But I noticed her giving sideways looks at a girl in her class wearing a cute summer-y dress that set off her dark hair and brown eyes, with cute sandals -- all mayhaps a wee touch more stylish than what my daughter wore.
Sideways looks turned into a glare when this girl was given a prize bag for good attendance to class.
Later, in the car getting ready to head home, I asked my daughter who the girl was and if they were friends. She spit ou the girls name like it was a curse, and said with exaggerated enunciation:
"She is my nemesis!"
7-year-old girls are scary enough, I am not looking forward to the teenage years.